• #1: We’re all God’s children. Some of us just deserve a higher allowance.
• #1: Some chick asked me what I would do with 10 million bucks. I told her I’d wonder where the rest of my money went.
• Skirt #1: Whenever I get stressed, I go shoe shopping.  [exits]. Suit #1 (to Suit #2): Obviously not for running shoes. 
• #1: if you have a job where you have to wear a nametag, nobody gives a shit what your name is.
• #1: The Obama administration has single-handedly revived the layaway industry.
• #1: Rules are for the obedience of fools, and the guidance of people like us.
• [classic] #1: Riding the subway reminds me why I am pro-choice.
• #1: Europe is starting to make African leaders look competent.
• #1: The fact that most people are too stupid to know how dumb they really are is the fabric holding our society together.
• #1: Hey fat fuck, I already know what your resolution is.
• #1: Whenever I see a black guy with my last name, I can’t help but wonder if my family used to own his.
• #1: She’s only about 3 weeks of anorexia away from looking hot. #2: Maybe 4.
• 1: Look thru her passport. You can usually tell if the relationship is worth pursuing. (Laughs) 3 stamps, and they all say ‘Cancun.’
• #1: Obama is aging fast enough for Morgan Freeman to play him in a movie.
• #1: Groupon… Food stamps for the middle class.
• #1: Fact. Nearly 50% of all American workers have less than $10k saved for retirement. #2: Fuck. That wouldn’t cover a ski weekend.
• #1: Either Facebook sucks, or my friends suck.
• #1: I started winning the day I was conceived.
• #1: Ronald Reagan always spent Christmas in DC so more Secret Servicemen could spend it with their families. #aloha
• #1: I love watching Asian guys smell and swirl their wine obnoxiously. And then their faces get all blotchy. Pussies.
• #1: I’m rich, but not give-up-my-US-passport rich… Yet.
• #1: I help with the recruiting effort, or as I call it, the Office Beautification Project.
• [classic] #1: I wish I invested in poverty. It’s up 60% since 2001. #2: We did.
• #1: She wants the person I am 10% of the time, 100% of the time. #2: That’s you not being you. #EndIt
• #1: Sending flowers to her office is like a big neon sign to her coworkers saying, “The asshole screwed up again.”
• #1: If you want a friend, get a dog. If you want a friend with benefits, find some chick who’s in PR.
• #1: In New York, don’t trust a banker with a pocket square. In London, it’s a pinky ring… And in Asia, don’t fucking trust anyone.
• MD#1: Every horrible wife starts out as an adorable girlfriend.
• [classic] #1: My garbage disposal eats better than 98% of the world.
• #1: If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.
• #1: If I were single and always sober, I wouldn’t need to password lock my iPhone.
• #1: Can we please stop calling them ‘hipsters’ and go back to calling them ‘pussies?’
• [classic] #1: The Euro is dead. They’re just bickering over who pays for the funeral.
• #1: A protester sees my Benz, and wants to rip me out of it. A real man sees my car, and wants to work hard so he can buy it one day.
• Suit#1 (on cell phone): “Yes… Yes… I know… Yes… Ok, you too… Bye.” [hang ups]. “Jesus Christ, I hope my next wife doesn’t do this.”
• #1: China is the only country that gets to have towns in just about every city in the world.

I will promise you this, that if we have not gotten our troops out by the time I am president, it is the first thing I will do. I will get our troops home. We will bring an end to this war. You can take that to the bank. – Barack Obama Campaign Promise

Since becoming president, Obama has expanded the war deep inside Pakistan, into Yemen, Libya with black ops teams, loafers on the ground operatives, death dealing drones, tomahawk missiles, and a chorus of condemnation. In addition, the Obama administration is pushing for steps that would ultimately bring us closer to attacking Syria and/or Iran. Now Obama has committed to sending US military advisers, code for black ops, into Uganda. To be honest, this is more about hitting sales quotas for new military hardware than humanitarian concerns for the people of Uganda. Don’t forget that President Obama went on a Military-Industrial Complex sales roadshow in India.

It’s not entirely clear what lead the NYPD to push the civilian as the clip is a bit jerky. From what I can tell, the police where herding the crowd, the police might have pushed the female and she turned to him and might have deflected him initial push at which point she got clocked.

A separate video taken on the same day, shows a police officer in a scooter run over lawyer from the National Lawyer’s Guilde that was present as a legal observer. Again, the video is a little shaky but you can see you do see the police officer in the scooter hit the accelerator, what is also clear is that the police officer parks the scooter right on top of the right ankle of the man he ran over. The police officer puts pressure down on the leg of the man and sits on it for a little bit and eventually gets up with his baton in hand and pushes people clear of the scene leaving the man on the floor at a short distance. The man screams in agony for a few seconds when kicks the scooter off his leg at which point four officers jump on him to make the arrest, assaulting a police officer no doubt.

It’s only a matter of time until the police starts cracking heads.

In the sports, there have name a few memorable name changes. Cassius Clay changed his name to Muhammad Ali after converting to Islam. Most recently, Chad Johnson changed his name to Chad Ochocinco. Now, it’s been reported that Ron Artest is considering changing his name to Metta World Peace. According to Wikipedia, Metta means loving-kindness or friendliness.

It’s only a matter a time when a top sports figure changing his name to a brand. Can you imagine if Michael Jordan changed to Swoosh Jordan.

Now, the best name change in sports was of basketball player Lloyd Bernard Free who changed his name to World B. Free.

I honestly believe that the TSA would like all Americans to travel in railway cattle freight wagons, much like the victims of the holocaust.

TSA Y U NO BUY ME DINNER FIRST

Obamatron

• If the government shuts down will President Barrack Obama declare himself Sultan Hussein Obama?
• The Obama 2012 campaign has begun… Obama to deliver speech from Facebook. I hope he will friend me.
• Did the president just propose to share medical test results with your doctors on Facebook?
• What is the president rambling about comparing the economy to cars “they still have clutch cars…?” I don’t think he has a drivers license.
• We are both a nation of immigrants and a nation of laws – Obama
• President Obama is the ringmaster of the sideshow, carnival, and circus of Obama barkers.
• One way to prove if President Obama’s birth certificate is real is to look in the back and see if it’s “Made in China.”
• Obama’s Birth Certificate for President 2012.
• The fact that there was a birther debate for over two years proves President Obama lack of leadership outside his minions and Obamabots.
• Real transparency ends the debate.
• President Obama should just preemptively make available all public records and transcripts. He could just end the debate.
• President Obama and the Obamabots fuel and seed the birther debate and the “sideshows and carnival barkers.
• I have a birth certificate therefore I am.
• Don’t be an Uncle Obama.
• The name of my autobiography: I, Barry Soetoro
• Obama promised to end the war in Iraq, but instead he got us involved in a civil war in Libya.
• President Obama quietly accepted his transparency award from the open government community this week in a closed, undisclosed meeting.

Got Gov?

• IRS agents don’t carry calculators, they carry guns.
• Half of congress are trolls the other half are tools.
• Welcome to the United Slaves of America.
• Every time the TSA fondles your nuts a terrorist gets his wings.
• In a transparent government there is no need for FOA requests because the information would already be in the public.
• Just like real men are secure with themselves to wear pink, real democracies don’t scan the naked bodies of men, women, and children.
• There is little surprise that Russian police confiscated thousands of books describing Russian police corruption.
• What percent of China’s economy is based on copying, cloning, knock offs, piracy of American intellectual property?

War Racket

• America will be in engaged in conflict across the globe for the next twenty years. This is World War III, we just don’t know it.
• We are in the midst of World War III and we just don’t know it.
• You can follow the money, or you can follow the oil.
• Military speeding has besieged the economy.

Pronpaganda

• Twitter is full of trolls, spooks, bots, and sockpuppets, and social media experts. I just don’t know which is worst to follow.
• Does the US State Department run social media training camps in the Middle East?
• Retweet Journalist is to journalism what back seat drivers and air chair quarterbacks are to NASCAR and football, respectively.
• Dear @CNN, thanks for reporting all day on important news such as the royal wedding and not depressing news such a deadly tornado back home.
• CNN should rename the network to SNN, Shill News Network.
• The white house has a green room and a green screen room.

Royal Wedding

• The royal wedding was a parade of bad teeth and bad hats.
• The royal wedding is ruining my relationship.
• The royal family is the biggest bunch of dead beat welfare recipients.
• The only commentary about the monarchy and royal wedding is that of Thomas Paine.
• If Price William had to battle for the crown of England as did his inbreeding barbarian ancestors he would end up being the court jester.

Questions

• Is any employee worth $100 million dollars?
• How do you monetize the bubble?
• Why does naturally flavored sparkling water have aspartame?
• What platform will reach the singularity first?
• What the hell is Microsoft Project Server 2010 Accounts?
• Does anyone use the Stickybits app?
• Is social Google’s Vietnam?
• Who moved my cheese? Who broke my test?
• Is the point and shoot camera a thing of the past like film?
• Is there a four square for time travellers?
• You think Ansel Adams read his camera’s user guide?
• Is there a haters convention?
• Hacker or hustler?
• Smart phones or spy phones?
Is Nicolas Cage the new Mel Gibson?
• How do you monetize fear?
• Why don’t we declare war on warmongers?

Quotes

• What is the ROI of your mom? – @garyvee
• Creativity is a renewable resource. – Biz Stone
• The chef doesn’t know the secret in the secret sauce? – Chef Ramsey
• Clutch cars, do they still have them? – Obama

Randumb

• I dream in stereophonic sound.
• Mixed signals: just say no + just do it = just say do it
• I would love to eat dinosaur flavored Japanese style noodles instead of the chicken ones I am eating now.
• Remixing ZZZZZzzzzz and dreams.
• Everybody is a marketter.
• The name of my autobiography: FML, the story of my life.
• A pot pie is not what I thought it would be, completely different than pot brownie.
• The cost and stress of doing your taxes should be tax deductible.
• In the future everything will taste like aspartame, and not like chicken.
• Making and microwaving are not the same thing, don’t say on when you mean the other.
• In business you can patent a business process, porn industry is a large business, why not patent sex moves as a business process.
• Some guys are better bachelors than they are boyfriends.
• I love trolls, they are good for the lulz.
• I have a barcode there for I exist.

Retweet Revolution

• 1. Start a armed rebellion. 2. Open a central bank. 3. ????? 4. Profit 5. New national anthem.
• Rock the revolution.
• Not every rebel force is lead by a Luke Skywalker.
• Big winner in Libyan Revolution of 2012 is Qatar.
• Obama promised there wouldn’t be any boots in the ground in Libya, I guess CIA operatives don’t use boots.

Is Osama bin Laden a Saudi Royal?
No. Osama is not a member of the Saudi royal family but the bin Laden family has strong ties with them.

Was Osama a CIA Asset?
It has been documented that the CIA was actively involved in covert activities against the Soviets in Afghanistan. The CIA trained and armed the Afghan mujahideen to fight the Soviet invasion force. During this time, Osama would have been in contact with the CIA which had the same object of getting the Soviet army out of the region.

Was Osama the Mastermind of the September 11, 2001 Attack on the United States?
Osama bin Laden and al-Queda took credit for the September, 11, 2001 attack on the United States.

Why did Osama bin Laden Attack the United States on September, 11, 2001?
The overly simplified answer to why Osama bin Laden attacked the United States was is that he was retaliating against the what United States foreign policy, most notably the first Gulf War and the US sponsored embargo targeting the Saddam Hussein regime.

Was the Killing of Osama bin Laden an Assassination?
The killing of Osama is a Chicago-style assassination straight out of the mafia’s playbook. People still want to know where Jimmy Hoffa is buried. Also remember that the Navy SEALS Team Six is an extraction team and came out of the failed 1980 attempt to rescue American hostages at the U.S. Embassy in Iran. Multiple reports have stated that Osama was not armed when he was shot dead with two precise kill shots, in the head and chest.

Why Was Osama bin Laden Assassinated?
Killing Osama and dumping his body in the ocean is the best cover, no body, no questions, no evidence. Osama had already fulfilled his usefulness to the organization so he was executed. Also, capturing him a live would present future political problem for Obama such as where to jail Osama, what court should try him, would it be okay to torture him, etc.

Is Osama bin Laden a Martyr?
In the middle east, just about anybody that dies, whether from a motorcycle accident to accidental self inflected gun wound is a martyr.

Was the Assassination of Osama bin Laden Justified?
No. Multiple report have stated that Osama was not armed and did not resist

Is There Pictures and Video of Osama’s bin Laden Death?
Yes. The picture released by the White House shows the President and his security team looking towards and captivated by a large monitor. The President most likely had multiple video and audio streams from the source. Also, it is common practice by police and military to photograph themselves with their ‘trophy’, either high value individuals or large number or confiscated guns or drugs. For example, we have a lot of pictures of Operation Red Dawn and the the capture of Saddam Hussein including images of service men triumphantly posing for pictures at the site where Saddam was capture, there are picture of his medical examination, etc.

Did President Barrack Obama Break International Laws in Assassinating Osama bin Laden?
Simply put, the constitution does not grant any president to send troops into another country which we have not declared war on to capture or kill any person. Only congress has the right to declare war, we are not going to declare war on Pakistan.

Is al-Queda a Threat to the United States?
al-Queda is a moderate threat. The al-Queda as it existed pre-9-11 has been destroyed with most of its leader dead or captured but there will always be lose knit organization in the region that will still continue to dislike American foreign policy in the region, including the fact that we went into a sovereign nation to assassinate Osama. Extremists groups such as al-Queda are a tool used by different governments to achieve different goals at different times in the covert and proxy war that is fought by regional powers.

Will the Department of Homeland Security Ease Security Restrictions?
No. Once you go black op, you never go back. There has been so much money made by too many people in the development, sale, and maintenance of naked body scanners for any agency to ease up their spending budget. The tight security restrictions are more about control over the populace than about securing the country. The power enacted by the Patriot Act have more often been used against Americans than your typical billionaire run international islamafacist terrorist organization.

An image surfaced in Facebook of a mortar shell used by Ghaddafi forces on the rebels with a insignia that to me immediately looked as a ‘star of david dangling from a parachute.’ I don’t read Arabic, but it seems that those that posted the image are claiming this to be irrefutable proof that the Libyan government are using Israeli munitions on its people. Andy Carvin took it amongst himself to prove this wrong using his journalism degree by just reposting the link on his Twitter account. LOL. This is is journalism in the age of social media, putting up your twitter account and reposting links. You can read the timeline of how Andy Carvin unearthed the fact that the shell is “most likely British made” and the graphic is probably an iconography describing the purpose of the shell. The icon of what seems like the star of David depicts indicates that it’s a flare.

Mortar Shell in Libya

If you look closely at the image in question, you can deduce the function of the shell from the label and icons on the shell. It reads “81 mm M ILLUM PARA L 20A L2Y.” The shell even includes the lot number. Anyone with common sense can know that this image doesn’t necessary mean that Israeli is backing or has backed the Libyan government.

Even thought this seems like common sense, it’s apparently not common sense for journalists like Andy Carvin who is taking credit of his ‘findings’ and social media mad hatter skills of Twitter, Google, and Facebook to ‘debunked sloppy reporting’. What is sad, is that he doesn’t dig deeper than these shallow findings. For one, from the ‘intelligence chatter’ that I am picking up, a great many of the rebel fighters think they are rebelling against their government because they have been told that it’s backed by Israel. The propaganda of this image in pro-Arab Facebook groups and Andy Carvin’s investigated journalism seems to confirm this. Someone is telling the rebel fighters that Israel is involved. The question is who is feeding this anti-Israel and anti-Ghaddafi propaganda to the rebels? Andy Carvin should also following up on why we are actively involved in Libya’s civil war but do very little to prevent the massacres taking place in the Ivory Coast.